Courtesy of Dweebist
Apologies for not blogging in a very very long time....we took some time off to visit family and catch up on much-needed house maintenance (boring I know) and as is Murphy's law, when you decide to take a holiday to wind down, someone always gets rundown and sick....so I just haven't had the chance to get online and blog.
I'm received some wonderful comments and emails from people who have come across my blog by way of Coreys wonderful blog, Tongue in Cheek and am so grateful as it has reminded me of how many people dream to live in Provence.
If I am to be completely honest - it has been a bit tricky for me and certainly during the first few months - I caught myself wondering if we had just made the biggest mistake of our lives. I have genuine respect for stay at home mothers, it has been a really tough role for me to transition in to. I always prided myself on being someone who wasn't defined by their job title, I wasn't someone who would introduce myself as "Hi, I'm Manager of such and such"....but it has taken me a little by surprise how hard it is to not go to work everyday and talk to colleagues you've known for years. In the office, I could rely on the tangible sense of achievement and recognition that I got when a job was done well but at home all day on your own with a toddler - even though you know he ADORES having his mum to himself - it is difficult to feel the same sort of recognition for the new job you are doing.... I am trying not to be so hard on myself and recognise that after nearly eight years of high stress - high adrenalin working / life rhythm that it will take some time to get into the swing of things in Provence....
Most articles and books I've read in the lead up to returning to work, post maternity leave, where about 'not opting out' such as 'Opting In: Having a Child Without Losing Yourself' and I battled to identify myself as the Flexi-mum throughout 'How Not to F*** them Up', deep down knowing I was a hugger....But nothing really prepared me for what happens when you do 'opt-out' of the workforce, the loss of an income, the loss of financial independence. ....You would think that living in one of the most beautiful villages in France, having unlimited time with my son and husband (as opposed to crazy conflicting commuting schedules), getting to speak french all the time and buy bottles of fine wine for under 5 euro would make a girl happy....oh but only if it were so easy!
Anyway, I have come to realise that leaving my career, moving country and relocating was mega stressful and each individual change was huge but combined it was only natural to feel somewhat uprooted. I have learned to take it easier on myself and not expect everything to happen so smoothly, basically to 'get with the Provence vibe'.
So a few things I've realised through this process. I am a natural-born home-maker, I love creating a home for my family, I have bottomless reserves of energy when it comes to putting our nest together. I am creative but when it comes to being creative - I can be a terrible procrastinator and time-waster - 'seize the day' is my new motto. I love having the time to cook good food (I've nearly cooked every recipe in Itsa cookbook since I received it as a leaving present) and taking luxuriantly long walks with no pressure to rush home. I am loving my quiet life right now and the rest will come in time I know!